The Two-Year Mindset War: When 'Strong Not Small' Isn't Enough

I’m going to be completely honest with you. It’s not so easy to practice what you preach—and this week, I really had to take a step back and face that truth.

If you’re a woman in menopause and grew up in a similar era to me, I know that at some point, you were subjected to the same pervasive pressures I was. I mean, we were. Poor body image thoughts, the tyranny of being 'tiny and small,' and a constant struggle with "not being thin enough" shaped our formative years.

I truly believed I had conquered that mindset. My mantra is clear: Be strong, not small. Build muscle. Recompose your body. Ignore the scale.

But this week, it hit me hard.

I was training as hard as ever—following my plan for longevity with high-protein meals, strength work, and cardio. I've seen incredible gains over the last two years.

Yet, despite knowing the science and preaching the benefits, the moment I stepped on the scale, everything fell apart.

The number was up. That voice from years ago, whispering, "It’s all about the number," was deafening.

Be strong, not small. Build muscle. Recompose your body. Ignore the scale.

My rational brain screamed the truth: You have built muscle and lost significant fat; weight gain is a sign of success! But I found myself questioning everything and immediately wanting to go on a diet. That is the ingrained struggle we face.

The vow I’ve made with myself going forward is this: No more weighing. I will continue to focus objectively on my body composition and celebrate the amazing gains I have truly made.

This is the real work of longevity. It’s not just lifting the weight; it’s finally dismantling the decades of self-criticism. If you’re reading this, you are not alone in that silent, frustrating moment where what you know is true battles what you feel is true.

If this resonates, you'll find more in my private Menopause Circle. Hope to see you there.